For shit's sake, one band I hate is Journey (ok, my ONE guilty pleasure is THIS, that I've never admitted in public while sober). Steve Perry has always been the epitome of a whiney-ass panty muncher, throwing his bullshit lines out there for jocks and collar popping assholes to milk in the back seats of daddy's Volvo. Yes, I guess deep down, I was insanely jealous of what it took to score the "high end ladies" of a redneck high school.
And, honestly, I've ALWAYS hated buttrock, save for a few songs here and there...does Live Wire by Motley Crue qualify as buttrock? I won't even get into most of them raping what I considered my childhood melodies by doing cover songs of (you dirty motherfuckers) of punk songs that I loved, just to appeal to the (then) newly minted hybrid rockpunkers, when everyone realized how shallow 80s metal really was. Sure, Pantera eventually came out of it, and I guess Metallica was considered cool and likable to pop-skaters in the late 80s. Er, Josh...your safety equipment needs adjusting, pal.
Vomit.
OK, having spent two paragraphs explaining why I knew I was so much cooler than the puff metal hair band lovers of the 80s, I have to now temporarily repudiate my over-emphasized hatred..at least in a Hollywood spoon-fed sort of way...
YUP, Rock of Ages. A musical for heterosexual males. Honestly, it allowed me to appreciate Journey, Poison, Warrant, and all of the other bands I've hated through the years..besides showing some rather unexpected talents of the folks in it. I was pretty amazed at how it kept me watching, and how important it became to have the surround sound pumping out the tunes I shunned so voraciously in my youth.
THIS is NOT the sexiest scene with Catherine Zeta-Jones
Alec Baldwin, politics aside (keep your caucus to yourself, yo), is funny as poop..and Russell Brand was unbelievably less full of himself than usual, making him more than bearable.
Mary J. Blige is one sweet-voiced vixen!!
That's about all I'll say, here. If you get a chance, check it out, whether you've ALWAYS had a hard-on for the 80s "hardrock" stuff, or, like me, always hated the hardrock (but always felt fortunate to have teened during the 80s), this is a fun movie.
BTW, I realized I commuted right down this very street in 1987, when I lived in Culver City and "worked" as a telemarketer. Seeing folks that looked like this lined up on the street was like seeing rock stars everywhere...too bad I was too cool to enjoy the experience. And luckily, a campy movie was made so that I could see glimpse of what I missed.
Ooooh, maybe I was to busy cruising the blvds on my old scoot. Yeah, I was punk as fuck, wasn't I.
Vomit.
OK, having spent two paragraphs explaining why I knew I was so much cooler than the puff metal hair band lovers of the 80s, I have to now temporarily repudiate my over-emphasized hatred..at least in a Hollywood spoon-fed sort of way...
YUP, Rock of Ages. A musical for heterosexual males. Honestly, it allowed me to appreciate Journey, Poison, Warrant, and all of the other bands I've hated through the years..besides showing some rather unexpected talents of the folks in it. I was pretty amazed at how it kept me watching, and how important it became to have the surround sound pumping out the tunes I shunned so voraciously in my youth.
THIS is NOT the sexiest scene with Catherine Zeta-Jones
Alec Baldwin, politics aside (keep your caucus to yourself, yo), is funny as poop..and Russell Brand was unbelievably less full of himself than usual, making him more than bearable.
Mary J. Blige is one sweet-voiced vixen!!
That's about all I'll say, here. If you get a chance, check it out, whether you've ALWAYS had a hard-on for the 80s "hardrock" stuff, or, like me, always hated the hardrock (but always felt fortunate to have teened during the 80s), this is a fun movie.
BTW, I realized I commuted right down this very street in 1987, when I lived in Culver City and "worked" as a telemarketer. Seeing folks that looked like this lined up on the street was like seeing rock stars everywhere...too bad I was too cool to enjoy the experience. And luckily, a campy movie was made so that I could see glimpse of what I missed.
Ooooh, maybe I was to busy cruising the blvds on my old scoot. Yeah, I was punk as fuck, wasn't I.
I bow down before you Lord Assman, fucking outstanding encapsulation/paraphrasing of my exact thoughts and feelings on that very subject, even though I was 'teening' when Journey, REO etc were first breaking out, like a wet fart in a lunch queue lineup, by the time the whole west coast hair metal deluge started I was bewildered and illed . . . . however . . . your ass-essment of the flick has made me determined to check it out, whick, in turn, will undoubtedly force me to similarly check myself, because, in case you hadn't picked up on it, I was punk as fuck too . . . ha ha fucking ha !!! Literary genius mate, exceptional stuff, really first rate, welcome back stranger !!!!!
ReplyDeleteI'm such a dopey, novice, Luddite . . . just thought I'd re-read the post and started hitting the shaded bits, I've now pooped my drawers, fucking hilarious my friend, you're a fucking riot, the hair alone always had me reasonably nauseated, just like the jocks who followed it . . . but hey, I'll check out all the spandex I missed out on, all hail Bluegrass Boy the Kentucky Krusader !!
ReplyDeleteHahaha, Kentucky Krackhead is more like it..I could've went on about how it makes you WANT to be in a hair band and able to jam as many notes into one measure as possible, or how well it parodies it's content while still exerting a respect for the genre, or how suddenly you're 17 again, and maybe wanting to be as cool as Stacee Jaxx, but I didn't. I just thought it was neat as hell!
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